Still Waiting

We spoke for 62 minutes today.
We spoke while I cruised through a McDonald’s Drive-thru.
We spoke as I checked the tire pressure on my car
And complained about the sensor light coming on again.
We spoke as I ate, long pauses as I chewed.
We spoke as I perused the news.
In 62 minutes today we had to condense 24 hours of our marriage.
It was not enough.
To connect.
To be intimate.
To describe our day.
To explain what needs to be done.
To discuss our child.
To exalt over her achievements.
It can never be enough.
In 62 minutes every day for the past 300 days.
How do we stay in touch?
Phone conversations.
Video calls.
Emails.
And thousands of texts that simply say
I love you
And
Wait for me.

The Measure of My Worth

I have reached inside my soul
and found that I am lined in gold.
It fills the cracks and fissures,
the erosion of my tears through troubled years.
It formed in veins, snaking over heart and mind
steeling them against the harsher times.
And my value cannot be seen by prying eyes
I’ve hidden away what makes it a prize.
It’s yours to take, yours to see
because you’ve always only seen the best in me.
 

Going Down in Flames

Baby, we were fire

Engulfed in each other’s sight

The tendrils of your flame

Set my soul alight.

Brittle, broken tinder

Littered my insides

A spark from you, a cinder,

caused me to ignite.

The friction building in whispers

In the velvet of deep twilight

Erupted, spewing embers,

Molten lava, melting frigid night.

Did you feel the burning?

Did it scald and scar your skin?

Can you see the marks of yearning,

the brands you left behind?

Baby, we were an inferno,

temperatures rising,

enveloping and blinding.

How did we survive it?

Distance is a Myth and This Too Will Become a Tale Someday

Poseidon in his watery prison has loved Selene from afar, turning his tides to draw her gaze upon him.
And Selene hung upon the velvet canvas of night unable to sink into the salty waves from her lofty height blinks slowly with regret, filling her vision with the peaked foam depths.
I love you like the ocean loves the moon, the sight of her in the night sky roiling the ocean into tidal frenzies.
I love you with the eternal pattern of nature, unwavering and confident in the reassurance of return.
I love you with the eternal intent of gods and the immortal imperviousness of our souls.
I love you as I have always and will always love you, in lives since passed and lives to come, and in that space of afterlife, our Heaven ensnared in each other’s eyes.
And long before the goddess took up residence beside the empty cratered lake to stand guard over far off blue green seas and long after those seas have ebbed eternally too heavy and ancient with geological burden I have, I will, love you.

Marry a Soldier and You Will Know True Love

You have never read a love letter until you have read one sent home to a soldier’s lover
And if you are not that soldier or his lover it is unlikely you will ever
Until their lives have waned and their years have been spent
And the pain of that distance has faded to a wistful reminisce.
You have never read a letter filled with so much palpable longing
And an honesty so profound it bleeds onto your fingers like spilled ink
And capped with a sign off of resignation and the literary equivalent of a sigh
As he hurries through the hastily scrawled pages to not say goodbye.
I love my soldier. I will treasure his hand written letters all the days of my life.
A soldier’s Wife

I know you love me

I know you love me in the way your eyes brighten as we debate
I know you love me in the way you bury your face in my neck.
I know you love me in the way you never falter to tell me “I love you”
And I know you love me by the curve of your smile
When your eyes meet mine and our hands entwine.
When you encircle my waist and twirl me around
The kitchen in our socks not even to sound.
When you rise out of bed each early morning
And try to leave without waking my snoring
But I called you back whenever I felt your absence
Beside me and demanded my good morning goodbye kiss.
I know you love me by the strength of your actions,
Your daily commitment, your outward affections.
I know you love me so I sleep soundly in knowing,
My husband, soulmate, best friend, our love will keep growing.

My Husband,

How could we have known when we shared shy glances all those years ago that we would build this life together? You were dressed in your uniform on a swelteringly humid and damp day patrolling the tents at the county fair. I wore a strappy long dress with bright colors and my hair was wild with the static and moisture of the September heat and playing hooky from my part-time cashier job that I held between my undergrad and grad years, in town for a much needed break from the monotony of retail.
I don’t think either of us was looking for love that day. Our hometown was probably the last place we expected to find it anyway. We had both had our first loves and broken hearts. We were in relationship limbo. Seeing you tripped me up. We broke all the rules from that moment on.
From a movie date that wasn’t a date, to hazy tequila flavored kisses, and a sunset on a mountaintop, our love story blossomed as quickly and as beautifully as Easter flowers. I was told to expect it to end, that relationships like ours were doomed to fizzle out. That the shiny would tarnish and the world would tint black again. But 3 1/2 years later and I fall in love with you more and more everyday. I don’t know how my heart creates room for our love to grow but by and by new seeds are sown and the garden of our devotion bears new buds each and every time I visit it.
We have found Paradise in each other’s soul.
A Soldier’s Wife

I miss…

the press of your lips against mine
in kisses close to the divine.
You make me believe in Heaven.